"From a programmer's point of view, the user is a peripheral that types when you issue a read request." -- P. Williams "Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the universe trying to build bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning." -- Rick Cook "Walking on water and developing software from a specification are easy if both are frozen." -- Edward V Berard "I think Microsoft named .Net so it wouldn’t show up in a Unix directory listing." -- Oktal "For a long time it puzzled me how something so expensive, so leading edge, could be so useless. And then it occurred to me that a computer is a stupid machine with the ability to do incredibly smart things, while computer programmers are smart people with the ability to do incredibly stupid things. They are, in short, a perfect match." -- Bill Bryson "Good design adds value faster than it adds cost." -- Thomas C. Gale "PHP is a minor evil perpetrated and created by incompetent amateurs, whereas Perl is a great and insidious evil, perpetrated by skilled but perverted professionals." -- Jon Ribbens "Perl – The only language that looks the same before and after RSA encryption." -- Keith Bostic "It is easier to port a shell than a shell script." -- Larry Wall "Beware of bugs in the above code; I have only proved it correct, not tried it." -- Donald E. Knuth. "I don't care if it works on your machine! We are not shipping your machine!" -- Vidiu Platon. "Sometimes it pays to stay in bed on Monday, rather than spending the rest of the week debugging Monday's code." -- Christopher Thompson "Most good programmers do programming not because they expect to get paid or get adulation by the public, but because it is fun to program." -- Linus Torvalds "Always code as if the guy who ends up maintaining your code will be a violent psychopath who knows where you live." -- Martin Golding